Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Staying Alive

Hello my loyal and dear readers. Fear not I have not deserted you for Facebook. Facebook is easy for quick updates, random comments, etc. Thus Facebook is easy for those trying to keep in touch while being frantically insanely busy. However it is not good for long thoughts, fictions biazarre, etc. So in other words, I desprately miss my blog. I have several posts half-formed in my head but I have no time to hammer them out, to follow their threads into the coherence.

No, instead I am still emershed in thesis. I have formatted, printed out, and have my last interview with the format adviser where hopefully I will hand her three boxes. Tucked into the box is my baby, printed out on 100% cotton paper, clean, crisp, black letter sharp against the white page. Last night at one, I ran out of paper, and my dear H went to an all night Walmart to get me more paper. My friend B took one look and said "My god that's a book." And it is...just a book...but so much more. A lot of pain went into those words...stories that happened both outside and inside the text. I look at those boxes and while a part of me longs to just hand them over, I feel a little saddness at letting go.

And I wish I could say...yes, tomorrow I'll write! But I can't. I have two more papers due, reams of correcting to complete, and eventually projects and finals to grade. But on May 16th, I will finally walk down that aisle and get my diploma. MA done. Ph.D to follow. But for now, I am still stressed, still tired, overly emotional, embroiled in complexity that is both good and bad but not happening at a good time.

Luckily I have H. I have my beasties. And now I have friends here. Lots of them that make me feel like leaving Charlotte will be a bit sadder than I planned. But for now they are good people, who eat and drink with us. They along with my love and my beasties have made this process a lot less painful.

7 comments:

Lolabola* said...

almost there!

The Fearless Freak said...

I always have at least 5 or 6 blog posts rattling around in my head. None of them ever get finished and it ends up being weeks between postings

Ginger As in Green Tea... said...

Me too. I miss my blog though and think that I might be spending more time here then on Facebook once my papers are done.

Thanks Lola. I submitted my thesis today. Now to finish up my two classes. Hurray.

John B-R said...

Congrats, Ginger. A big step. My son-in-law completed his dissertation defense on Monday. Same kind of thing.

Of course, my son just proposed to his girlfriend, who yes accepted. So I'm led to think that every completion is the beginning of something else ...

How exciting. Where are you going for the PhD? I should probably know this ... my bad if you've said it a million times ...

Horacio said...

Yes! I miss the greenteaginger daily dose, on the rocks...

Ginger As in Green Tea... said...

With a little shot of something thrown in...

John congrats to both your sil and your son. Big news all around.

Ph.D...well applying too...Emory, Duke, UT Austin, UC Santa Barbara, Princeton, and University of Toronto.

John B-R said...

If you get to UCSB we'll meet ...